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January 16, 2006
I Have A Dream
Posted at January 16, 2006 10:06 AM in Lifestyle .The guy who takes a chance, who walks the line between the known and unknown, who is unafraid of failure, will succeed. - Gordon Parks
Yesterday I covered a Martin Luther King Day celebration put on by a friend of mine. It was truly inspiring to see so many young people speak on the accomplishments of Dr. King. Often, I come across young folk who know nothing of King’s work, may know a little about his speeches – particularly the “I Have A Dream” speech, but the history of the civil rights movement is lost on many of them.
One young man asked me if I marched with Dr. King. Maybe it was all of the gray in my hair that caused him to ask such a question but I told him no, that I was 10 years old when Dr. King was killed but I do remember those days. Before long I was telling him about Dr. King, Malcolm X, Mark Clark, Fred Hampton and their murder by Chicago’s finest, the Black Panther Party and SNC. Continuing, I told him about the man I most admired, Gordon Parks, Jr. and how he did something during a time when many Black men did not feel they had the freedom of movement. I told him, Gordon Parks just did it. He did not worry about the color of his skin or what others would say. He just did it.
The young man did not know about Gordon Parks and wanted to
know more. I directed him to Parks’ book, A Choice of Weapons, and told
him to read it and through that 
reading he would learn a lot about the
civil rights movement and the treatment of Blacks during that time. I
also told him about Louis Gossett, Jr. and his role in An Officer and A
Gentleman, the role that won him an Oscar. My brother and I had just
talked about his role in the movie and I told this young man that Louis
Gossett, Jr. did not go in for a part that said “Black man” he went in
to read for the part of an officer. He did not allow color to dictate
what part he would audition for. Then I looked at him and said it is
truly the content of your character, not the color of your skin.
The young man did not know about Louis Gossett, Gordon Parks, or much about Dr. King sans what he had read. In an almost embarrassed tone, he had not heard much about these Black men in his own family. Since he was old enough to be a child of mine—he was about 20, 21 years old—I had this sinking feeling that my generation did not do enough to teach our young. He felt encouraged by our talk and I felt proud to have met him and glad for the opportunity to speak with him.
Later, my girlfriend approached me to talk about the show next week. I told her about the rehearsal on Saturday and how I felt a little uncomfortable about doing comedy. “Comedy?” she asked. “You’re doing comedy?” She seemed a bit disappointed that I was being asked to do comedy and thought this was far a field for me. “Yeah,” she said, “some of your stuff is funny but it’s the message behind it, not comedy.” Her statement did not make me feel any better about the show but I assured her it was a favor for a friend and I needed the exercise, being in front of an audience, and more importantly, I need to get out, practice a bit, stretch the dendrites, pop a new synapse, whatever, the exercise would be good for me.
The one thing I discovered through our rehearsal on Saturday was that I might like doing a little stand-up routine. I need to break through some boundaries. I need to stop being so serious. Now, I may bomb, but the point of it, like Keith said, is to have fun and that’s what I plan to do. My friend, however, sees me doing more serious stuff. She wants to get a little jazz group together, have me do poetry, spoken word, talk to folks about my life and experiences, not comedy. She was very disappointed to say the least.
She convinced me to have coffee with her and being true to her PR background, she voiced her concerns about me being pigeonholed. “I’m trying to create an image for you. I’d like to see you do shows but not here in California” she said. Her conversation was so overwhelming I came home and went straight to bed, took a nap, and pretty much slept the afternoon away. Our conversation was so depressing.
People have always had a certain image of me and typically, without seeing me as a whole person, try to pigeonhole me in their own way. I believe and will always believe I can do anything I want to do, I enjoy thinking like this. Unfortunately, I will always have someone, somewhere, trying to pull me in one direction only which stifles my growth. Sure, I feel a little uncomfortable with comedy because, on some level I’ve always felt comedy was a useless art form. However, after our rehearsal on Saturday, I came to understand the creative process behind comedy, improvisation, and actually, it is no different than what I do on many levels. Granted, I’m not a comedian, but the process is very similar and honestly, do I care if people laugh? No. It’s a performance.
Later, I called my friend to inform her that our earlier conversation wiped me out. I told her of my conversation with the young man earlier and told her “I am a woman of many talents and I can do all things. There is nothing I cannot do.” As far as I am concerned, life is meant to be lived to the fullest and I intend on living each day as if it were my last. Comedy? Yes ma’am I am going to have fun doing it. If I bomb, so freak’n what. I’ll have something to laugh about in the winter of my years. I told her I am going to enjoy myself, make a fool of myself, and enjoy every moment of it. Then I asked her not to dictate my art.
Actually, the little sleep did a world of good for me. I’ve been having problems remembering my dreams since being on so much medication. But yesterday, I did have a dream like Dr. King. My dream told me I should think about doing a number of things using images, music, spoken word and perhaps some songs—yes, me sing. I can be funny, serious, whimsical, whatever I choose and, contrary to what happened 20 years ago when I first started doing this, I will not let anyone tell me how to do it, what I should do, and when and where I should do it. That, is what bothered me about our conversation yesterday, 20 years later and I’m dealing with the same thing—someone interested in controlling my voice, again. This time, instead of withdrawing as I did 20 years ago, I will act and control my own voice. I don’t need someone doing that for me.
My friend agreed but she could not resist sticking in a little knife by saying “I hope you will understand my not going to the show. I can’t see you do comedy.” I accepted her sentiment though I really wanted to tell her to go f--- herself.
My dream of reality, for me, is and has always been I can do all things. Life is much too short to get caught up in any one thing. One must always stretch the boundaries, explore, seek knowledge, grow. If I don’t, I will surely die. Like Dr. King said, it is the content of my character not the color of my skin that defines who I am. I refuse to have anyone tell me what I can and cannot do. I think it was Jill Scott who said it best, I’m living my life, from this point forward, like it’s golden.
Enthusiasm is the electricity of life. How do you get it? You act enthusiastic until you make it a habit. -- Gordon Parks
Change does not roll in on the wheels of inevitability, but comes through continuous struggle. And so we must straighten our backs and work for our freedom. A man can't ride you unless your back is bent. -- Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.
Comments
What does she mean you can't do comedy? She should have heard what you really wanted to tell her. Now that was funny! lol Go break a leg!